Sunday Confessions: Blogging for Me

Blogging has changed a lot since I first started writing here a looooong time ago. It used to be something that people did for fun, to keep their friends and families updated on their lives. Personal blogs used to be really big, and I loved being able to keep up with my friends and whatever they were doing. 

Then things changed.

Blogging turned into something people could make money at. Soon, instead of fun, personal posts, bloggers were writing about crafts and recipes and anything else that appealed to a wider market. Then they started hosting ads on their pages. Next came sponsored posts. And now, we are where we are. People are blogging for money, and taking high profile sponsors. Every post had to be Pinterest worthy and appeal to everyone.

And I don't like it. 

I used to love writing about the random things that happened to me. I wrote honestly about my life. So when the era of big bloggers started, I thought I'd try my hand at it. I wrote a post or two that maybe could have been popular. But I didn't like how it felt. I wasn't saying things that I really thought, I was saying things that I hoped people would like. I wasn't being true to who I was. 

So I'm changing it. 

I've started doing monthly recap blogs because I like to. Sure, I was inspired by some popular bloggers, but I genuinely like looking back through the past 4 weeks and remembering the adventures I had. I've written about goals I've set, because that's something important to me. I want to start writing blog posts about dream vacations, short stories, and just random things because that is what I find interesting. That's what I like writing about, and I don't care if it makes me popular or not.

And I don't expect it to change. 

It's clear that blogging is now it's own beast, and that there's no way to control it. I don't expect to change the world of blogging with my little stand. I'm going to keep writing for me because it's how I want to grow as a writer, not because I want a thousand followers or to become popular on Pinterest. I just want to be a better writer. And when I start listening to me, and stop writing for other people, that's when I write the best. 

Rough Landing

Guys. Traveling to New York yesterday was probably the hardest day of traveling that I've ever had. And I've been left waiting at the American border, and spend 30 hours straight coming back from London. 

We flew out of Salt Lake, which is usually a pretty easy experience. Only, this time, it wasn't. Since Luke's company paid for the tickets, they put my last name as D. Only, all my identification, including driver's license, passport, and {expired} student ID is under N. So when we got to the TSA guard, my names didn't match. 

Apparently that's a problem. 

They called up a new guard to figure everything out. He had to call up another agent to check if I was on any watch lists {hint: I'm not}. Finally, I was allowed through, but only if I agreed to additional screening. Which meant that I had to go through the full body scanner and get patted down. Twice. The first one was pretty basic. Just a quick check of my arms and legs. Then I had another agent search my carry on bag, as well as the rest of me. It wasn't as invasive as I thought it would be, although she did test her gloves after giving me the pat down. My best is that they're either checking for cocaine or gunpowder. 

All together, that took about half an hour. We made it to our plane in plenty of time, though. And the flight itself was pretty smooth. Well, not literally. There was a lot of turbulence, since there's so many winter storms going on. 

Things got stressful again for our connecting flight in Houston. That is a BIG airport. So big, we had to take a shuttle from terminal C to terminal B. Meaning that we had to hustle in order to get on the plan at the right time. But we made it! 

Finally, we got to LaGuardia, which is actually a pretty small airport. All was well until my suitcase came out of the baggage claim. I don't know what happened, but one of the wheels was pretty damaged. And by damaged, I mean, it's totally missing, and there's a big chunk missing from the bottom corner of my bag. So it looks like I'm going to need a new suitcase in order to get home.

Things started looking up when we got to the apartments where we'll be staying. It's close to the subway stop and several restaurants. I'm not sure what else is around, since I haven't been out exploring yet. Plus, the apartment is really nice. I don't think we'll need to worry about cockroaches, which was one of my main concerns being here. 

Here's the view from our living room window: 

I Hate You

Just when I think that maybe winter isn't so bad, the clouds send forth freezing rain, making my driveway and all the sidewalks into skating rinks. 

I slipped. Thrice. 

Winter, I hate you, and I can't wait until March. 

Stress

For the most part, the past year has been pretty stress-free. I finished school last December, and so I stayed at home and ... well ... didn't do very much. I volunteered on a few film projects, deep cleaned our apartment, but I wasn't working, so there wasn't much for me to do. Finally, in August, when I filed all the paperwork {it always comes back to the %@*# paperwork}, that's when my stress began. 

Suddenly there were more things to file, appointments to make and keep, jobs to find and keep, and now that we finally are going to the interview, my stress level is pretty high. I'm not saying this for sympathy; I'm saying it because it's true and so when I look back on this some day, I won't say "boy, getting a Green Card wasn't as stressful as the movies make it seem". It is every bit as panic inducing as The Proposal. At least I know that I didn't get married just for the status change.  

Tomorrow, after the interview, there will be nothing left but waiting for the actual card itself to come in the mail. Unless we fail, then there will be another interview and who knows what else. 

Incidentally, today is the first time I've ever experienced stress eating. I can't say I enjoy it much. 

A Moving Post, Day 293745

Okay, I admit, it hasn't been that many days. But I feel like has. I am worn out, tired, and frustrated.  Last Saturday, we went and got the keys to the new apartment, and brought over two loads {even though we weren't technically supposed to move in until Sunday, so said the previous rentors, even though we had discussed moving in earlier, such as Wednesday}.  Luke's parents came down with their truck, to bring us some furniture, as well as move our bigger things. Having them come and help took a load off my mind. 


So on Sunday, with our helpful friends, we moved the rest of our things. I'm pretty sure we had about 6 carloads of stuff. Where did all this stuff come from? I am so confused. We had a small apartment, and not a lot of places to put things. But as we were packing, there just kept being more and more stuff. 


Once things were moved out {mostly}, I left Luke to be in charge of the moving shenanigans, and turned my attention to cleaning. Perhaps it's because I've been dealing with BYU cleaning checks for the last 6 years, but MAN, did I leave that house in good condition. Sink scrubbed out, oven cleaned, shower wiped down. I even did the baseboards!   And by me, I mean me, with a little LOT of help from K. and M. I couldn't have done it without them. 


At this point, things are moved out, and things are mostly clean. So I head over to the "new" apartment. Let me paint a picture for you. 


It's muggy and hot, because the carpets were cleaned the day before, and hadn't dried yet, plus the air conditioner wasn't on. There are boxes everywhere. One corner of the living room has been stripped down to drywall, and there's a large hole, exposing the brick wall that this room was built around. Why? Because there's a leak, and the best way to find a leak is to put a hole in the wall. {UPDATE: we think it's because the sprinkler system is leaking. There's only water in our house when the sprinklers are going} . Besides all that, the people who moved out didn't clean a blessed thing. Nope. Goo on the front of the stove. Stuff still in the garburator. The bathroom sink crusted over with ... I don't even know. 


There are plus sides to living here, I promise. We are close to campus, downtown, friends, and the library. There are about 10 restaurants within walking distance. It's much larger than our previous place, for the same rent. And I'll find more positives. For now, when things are in boxes, and I'm cleaning other people's mess, I'm gonna be a little frustrated. 


The point of this post was to let you know that we're here in the new house, we have unpacked our dishes, and hung things up in the closet. We're here to stay. For a little while longer, at least. 

A Moving Post, Day 2

Sometimes, dealing with other people is really, really hard. 


Like, when they tell you that you can move in on one day, and then suddenly, they tell you that you can't move on that day. 


And when they tell you that you will have fancy brand new carpet when you move in. And then they tell you that the carpet is all torn out, but no new carpet is in sight. 


I would be much more eager to move, despite these setbacks, if the new place looked anything like this: 

Unfortunately, it does not. Not even a little bit. 

P.S. I would give credit for the picture, but for some reason, the internets tell me that the original page no longer exists. 

A Moving Post

We are moving on Saturday. 


So far, we packed up all our books, blankets, and everything in our huge dresser. Seriously, huge. It stores a lot of stuff. It took a while to get it empty. 


Today, I changed all of our addresses. Except on Amazon. Shoot. 


But I'm getting stuff done. And feeling pretty good about myself.  


Next up: non-essential bathroom stuff. 

Trendy Things I Hate

Disembodied mustaches - seriously, this trend can die. Mustaches are cool on old cowboys, Harley drivers, and my dad. That is all. A felt one on a stick so you can take a dumb engagement photo? Stupid. Made of chocolate on top of my cupcake? Sure, I'll eat it {because it's chocolate}, but it's also very stupid. On a pacifier for my baby? Are you an idiot?

via

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Homemade DIY Everything, even when it costs more and takes more time to make it yourself things - for reals, there is no point to homemade shaving cream when it involves 4 "ingredients" and 20 minutes. Just buy the shaving cream! How much is it, like $2? Also, it suddenly isn't "natural" shaving cream if you're using dollar store hair conditioner, just because you made it yourself. 

"Pops" - mostly cake pops or cookie pops. It's a mini-mini cupcake. I need, like, 10 of them in order to feel satisfied. Plus, the sticks are always sooooo  long, and the little morsel at the end falls off before I can eat it. 

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Grumps

Sometimes, no matter what I do, I'm in a bad mood. 


Today was one of those days. 


It got worse when I found out we're teaching nursery again tomorrow. For the third week in a row. 

I'm Surrounded by the Obnoxious

For some reason, I get all sorts of junk email. But not just the real junk. Notices and updates from websites where I've ordered things, like amazon.com and Wal-mart. Subject lines of "You haven't ordered in a while. We miss you!!!!". I find this annoying. You don't miss me, you miss my money. Plus, there's the real junk, like "check your credit score NOW", or offers for inappropriate things. 


Then, there's the junk calls. In the past 24 hours, I've had 7 calls from unknown numbers. When I looked them up, they all have reviews saying that they're telemarketers. I'm not sure who sold my number, but I'm royally ticked off. 


At least I don't get a lot of junk mail in my real mail box. That is my saving grace. 

Box

Do you ever have those days where you feel like you're stuck in a box? And you can either just stay in the box (which makes you grumpy), or you can try to get out of the box (which makes you cranky)? 


No? 


Well, that's me, today. 

Typical

Of course. I know it's December. And I know it's almost Christmas. But seriously? Did it have to snow today? On the day I have a final from 8-10pm? I don't want to drive home in the snow and cold. or drive TO school. Curses. Good thing I'm a tough Canadian girl. I've driven home in the snow before. I can do it again..... maybe. 

For a minute, I thought I was going to have two posts on the same day (not that there's anything wrong with that....), but I realized that it's now past midnight, so I'm good. 


I just want to say-----BOO to FEEDBACK FORMS. I like giving feedback, I don't like filling out the same form a bajillionity times. 


This is why I can't add my professor on Facebook. I rant about his class there. I also rant about it here. Because I feel a little safer here. Even though there are probably creepers. But that's okay. They don't determine my final grade. I hope. 


One last story to go. One.....more..... I can't convince myself to do it. Sorry, E. 


Just kidding. I'll go do it now. By then the Dr. P will have worn off and I can SLEEP. Even though I have too many other things to do. 

Writer's Drama

I can't do it any more. I don't want to. I'm sick and tired and a bit fed up. I mean, enough is enough! Part of me wants to just end it all......


Down with feedback forms! I love the people in my writing class, and I love their stories. But I am SO TIRED of hashing out their stories over and over and over and over.... It just makes me tired and frustrated, and I feel like I'm more worried about filling in the blanks than I am about giving helpful feedback. 


So yeah, I'll be up for a little while. More forms to fill out. 

The World is Full of Pood Nuggens

Today is a day when everything is the worst. People are beyond ridiculous. Weather is schizophrenic. Either buildings on campus have cranked up the heat to combat the cold or the air conditioning is on from the summer.  Everything FAILS. I'm just glad I don't work in a place that requires constant interaction with people. That wouldn't go well today. 


Tomorrow I'll give you happy things to read.

The End of an Era(s)

I have just found out something majorly important. Several things, really.


1. A few classes for my Women's Studies minor have been dropped. I have one more to do, and then I'm done!


2. I've been having more and more difficulties with my cell phone provider, T-Mobile. So much so, that I'm considering dropping them. Which is too bad, because I like their phones, plans, and reception. But when for the 4th month in a row your payment isn't processed properly, and you get charged three times, it might be time to move on to greener pastures (Virgin Mobile, anyone?) 

I am Upset

In a world of high speed, 3G networks, and being able to send texts via a shakey connection, you'd think that all the glitches would be worked out.


W.R.O.N.G.


My internet died. And the internet I'm using now has blocked Facebook. And my email.

Birthday Woes

Well, today is the day before my birthday. And today, I have to go to the dentist and get braces. Yep. The day before I turn 22. I am not pleased. 


For those who are interested, it's because I have TMJ, a condition that affects the joints that allow your jaw to move. Because of this, my jaw doesn't work the way everyone else's does, and my teeth have moved because of that. 


What a nasty hand to be dealt by karma. It's my birthday tomorrow! Gosh!

Grrr....

I hate when blogger sets my font at the wrong font, even when I've set it to what I want.

FYI....

The worst thing ever? Automated voice messages. Also, how I spent my morning. Curious? 

Computer generated voice: 

Thank you for calling [insert call center name here]: 

Press 1 for English

Press 2 for French

Press 3 for Spanish

Press 4 for Cantonese 

Press 5 for Swahili

Press 6 for weather updates in Jamacia 

Press 7 for something vaguely related to your call 

Press 8 to change your password 

Press 9 to take your name off our do-not-call list 

Please stay on the line, and an operator will assist you

**waits patiently, despite horrendous elevator music** 

"Hello, and welcome to [call center name]. How can I help y..... *click click*

**DIAL TONE OF DEATH**